i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
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