I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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