Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I touched a dick in church today
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
