i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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