Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(817): View more from Texas

My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.

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(512): View more from Texas

And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes

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(828): View more from North Carolina

Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am

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(641): View more from Iowa

TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY

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(251): View more from Alabama

I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.

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(813): View more from Florida

thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not

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(740): View more from Ohio

See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want

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(609): View more from New Jersey

so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed

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