i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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