Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
