dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
