he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
