Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I am naked and annoyed.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
