I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
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