So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
