She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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