before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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