i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Randomize
