he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
