"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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