he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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