just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
