my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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