We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
