I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
