If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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