She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
