I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
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