Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize