On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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