Well douche your snatch and let's go!
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
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