As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Randomize