sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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