That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
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