Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize