i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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