The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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