i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
