Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
