This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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