you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
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