I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
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