I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize