Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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