Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize