i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
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