I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
