Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Randomize
