..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
