Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
