turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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