I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize