i don't like sucking hair
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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