please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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