Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize