I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
